Reading aloud is one of the best things parents can do for their young children: teach them about the world and themselves, and even change the structural makeup of their brains .

But a new study serves as a stark reminder that the “what” and the “how” matter. When the researchers analyzed 247 books for children ages 5 and under (including a mix of bestsellers and titles pulled from "best of all time" lists), they found evidence of many gender stereotypes, for example, that women girls are better in language and boys. they are better at math.

Many stories also use language and gender concepts. When girls are the protagonists, books are more likely to use words that convey affection or contain words like "explain" and "listen." When children are the protagonists, the plots and language tend to focus more on work, transportation, and tools.

“There is often a kind of learning cycle about gender stereotypes, where children learn the stereotypes at a young age and then perpetuate them as they grow older,” said study researcher Molly Lewis, a special professor in Dietrich's departments of psychology and social and decision sciences. Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences, she said in a press release. “These books can be a vehicle to communicate information about gender. We may need to pay attention to what those messages may be and whether they are messages that you even want to take to children.”

Lewis stressed that she and her co-investigators are not looking to destroy family relationships with, say, Amelia Bedelia or Curious George. But there are simple steps caregivers can take to push back against language and gender stereotypes in picture books. Here are a few.

One of the best ways parents can counterbalance gender stereotypes in children's books, and this is What really applies to stereotypes of all kinds is making sure kids have access to gender-inclusive books at home and at the library. The internet is full of lists of representative children's book titles, including many that focus on LGBTQ characters. There are book and collection search engines that can also help.

In some books that include gender, a character's gender or sexuality is central to the plot; other times it is not. So-called “any child” books can also be powerful. The goal is to have a mix.

“That makes it matter what books you read,” Jennifer Goldstein, head of books with A Children's Book About, told HuffPost. "Seeing a strong representation of someone like you in a proactive and positive role is a pillar for your future self."

Also, make sure you don't only read books with male protagonists to boys and books with female protagonists to girls. The researchers behind the new study found that children are often exposed to stereotypes about their own gender, suggesting that parents don't necessarily mix them up.

“It is important for all of us to see all kinds of people doing everyday and important things. This means that all genders are visible, including cisgender, transgender and non-binary,” Goldstein said. “Reflect the current situation of humanity as a whole. This is a lifelong skill and it opens up for all people the idea that we can all do anything.”

Chances are your child will love a book or two that isn't exactly open-minded about gender roles. But you don't have to throw away books like these. Instead, use them. Books can be a great way to tackle important and thorny topics, especially for young children whose brains are growing. millions of neural connections per second.

“Every children's book is a moment of joy and a moment of education,” said Diane Ehrensaft, director of the Center for Child and Adolescent Gender, Mental Health at UCSF Benioff Children's Hospital in San Francisco.

They are not too young. The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that children learn a lot about what they think gender role behaviors are and what they "should" be early on, like at age 4.

So just look at the basic stereotypes and point them out.

“You can say something like, 'I'm looking at this and wondering why Sylvia always has to wear pink. And why can't Jeremy wear pink?'” Ehrensaft said. "You can just say, 'I wonder why it should be like this. And why shouldn't that be the color of a person?'”

Goldstein offered some other questions that can help move the discussions forward:

Another option: Make it a hands-on activity and use Post-its so you and your child can basically rewrite the book together. If there is something you would like to point out or reject, such as the same simple example of all the female characters in a book wearing pink, while all the boys are wearing blue, stick the Post-it in the book. Maybe write a thought bubble where a male character says, "Wow, I'd like to wear pink sometime."

“It's a creative activity with your child, so you don't have to put those books away. You can use and edit them,” Ehrensaft said. In addition, it is fun for children to play the author. And it gives them a sense of agency, Ehrensaft noted.

Of course, not every book has to be a teachable moment. None of the experts interviewed for this article argued that this was the case. Sometimes you and your toddler or preschooler will just want to snuggle up together before bedtime and get lost in a story without worrying about the bigger message. Do not force it.

“You should never make a child read what you believe,” Ehrensaft said. You also shouldn't lecture or argue with them if they have moments where they say yes, definitely pink. It's the color of a girl. They are young and they are learning. Parents are still learning, too.

“It's the beginning of a conversation,” Ehrensaft said.

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